What Couples Look for in a Bull

What do couples look for in a bull, and how do they decide who makes the cut?

Here's My Take

Because of a couple's past experiences, they're initially on the lookout for any obvious sign that a candidate might be a waste of their time. This likely seems pessimistic (because it is), but it gives you a clue into one of the largest hurdles couples face when interviewing "a third" - digging through the mountain of DMs, emails, and platform messages to pluck their top X from the pile and pursue them. Since a couple's (and especially a woman's) inbox tends to be so flooded, they realize they can't possibly spend the time it would take to give everyone a fair shake. This isn't because the couple is overly valuable or attractive; it's because the "fakes and flakes" come out to play and cock-block you efficiently and consistently. When a couple reaches out to an otherwise "serious" candidate, they get breadcrumbed, delayed, or distracted because their wannabe "bull" couldn't make it when things became real.

Knowing that, please take steps to get yourself out of that category as quickly as possible.

First, send nice face photos and ask for one in return (after you've already sent yours, which is a classy move)—no dick pics (please). Even if the couple asks for them, I advise against it anyway (a few women actually want to see it until they've met the person that the penis is attached to). The couple wants to imagine what it might look like to have a real conversation with you. All women are different, but most of the time, they want to establish some form of connection with you before sex is even on the table. Men who seem incapable or unwilling to do that will quickly fall back into the first category (see above).

Provided there is mutual interest, offer to meet after work in a public place, close to home (or in between if you live farther away). Fakes and flakes want to stay online and pretend, so any effort you make to break that fantasy/reality barrier will immediately set you apart (it will also help you ascertain whether the couple is real). If they can't meet, go ahead and try to set up a FaceTime or video call. She won't want to do this if she isn't looking her best, but this also signals to the couple that you're ready to make things real. Generally, offering a video call over a platform that the couple can use freely is best (Google, Zoom, etc.). Generally, try to steer clear of apps the couple needs to sign up for (fakes and cheaters often make the couple jump through multiple hoops to get on ... this platform or that platform ... and it becomes a sign to them that you belong in the first category again.

Also, get a feel for her food and drink preferences. This shows the couple you're thinking ahead and helps raise that green flag that you're real and ready to take things into reality (noticing a pattern?). The best bulls lead, even if the husband doesn't identify as a cuckold, and the couple appreciates someone who is organized and prepared.

The Counterargument

The common counterargument is a general beef that bulls feel they're doing "more" of the work, and in the beginning, they probably are. But once you're properly vetted, the couple will take care of the tedious parts, and you'll be reaping the benefits. Consider this an investment in time and energy; once you find the right couple, you won't even remember this part.

What To Do With This

Be prepared, think ahead, and be proactive. This means having great photos, being prepared for a video call or an in-person meeting (potentially the same day you chat), being curious about the couple and especially her, and taking an interest in her life and challenges. Getting into a couple's head should be your ultimate goal and the catalyst for all future interactions with them.

Good luck!